Grief After a Death...What is normal??? VicarDoug
Normal Reactions to Grief
When we suffer a loss, we may experience one or more of the following symptoms of grieving
1.
I feel my emotions are out of control?
I feel my emotions are out of control?2.I feel so relieved.
I feel so relieved.3.I find it hard to face the reality of the death of my loved one.
I find it hard to face the reality of the death of my loved one.4.I feel as though I am more anxious about everything.
I feel as though I am more anxious about everything.5.My body seems to be in distress. My immune system seems to be compromised and I am catching more colds than normal.
My body seems to be in distress. My immune system seems to be compromised and I am catching more colds than normal.6.My mood fluctuates over the smallest things.
My mood fluctuates over the smallest things.7.I sometimes feel hopeless over my life situation.
I sometimes feel hopeless over my life situation.8.I sometimes feel guilty and other times, I feel angry.
I sometimes feel guilty and other times, I feel angry.9.I cry at unexpected times.
I cry at unexpected times.10.I do not want others to see me when I feel sad.
I do not want others to see me when I feel sad.11.I am unable to concentrate or focus.
I am unable to concentrate or focus.12.I sense my loved one's presence. Sometimes, I find myself
I sense my loved one's presence. Sometimes, I find myself hearing their voice, seeing their face or waiting for them to walk through the door.
13.I have difficulty with the fast pace of my thought process.
I have difficulty with the fast pace of my thought process.14.I have trouble sleeping
I have trouble sleeping15.Sometimes I have no appetite.
Sometimes I have no appetite.16.I feel empty when I think about my loss.
I feel empty when I think about my loss.17.I miss having someone support me when making decisions.
I miss having someone support me when making decisions.18.I am so lonely and I feel tired much of the time.
I am so lonely and I feel tired much of the time.19.My relationships with friends and family have changed.
My relationships with friends and family have changed.20.I am more sensitive to what others say. I feel as though no one quite understands what I am going through.
I am more sensitive to what others say. I feel as though no one quite understands what I am going through.These grief responses are all natural and normal.
With their last breath
those we love do not say good byefor love is timeless.Instead, they leave us a solemn promise
that when they are finally at rest in God,they will continue to be present to uswhenever they are called upon.Let us fear not, nor grieve beyond letting go
the departure of those we have greatly loved,for in the Tree of Life their roots and oursare ever intertwinded.
Grief After Suicide
•Know that you can survive, even if you feel you can't.
Know that you can survive, even if you feel you can't. •Intense feelings of grief can be overwhelming and frightening. This is normal. You're not going crazy; you're grieving.
Intense feelings of grief can be overwhelming and frightening. This is normal. You're not going crazy; you're grieving. •Feelings of guilt, confusion, anger, and fear are common responses to grief.
Feelings of guilt, confusion, anger, and fear are common responses to grief. •You may experience thoughts of suicide. This is common. It doesn't mean you'll act on the thoughts.
You may experience thoughts of suicide. This is common. It doesn't mean you'll act on the thoughts. •Forgetfulness is a common, but temporary side effect. Grieving takes so much energy that other things may fade in importance.
Forgetfulness is a common, but temporary side effect. Grieving takes so much energy that other things may fade in importance. •Keep asking “why” until you no longer need to ask.
Keep asking “why” until you no longer need to ask. •Healing takes time. Allow yourself the time you need to grieve.
Healing takes time. Allow yourself the time you need to grieve. •Grief has no predictable pattern or timetable. Though there are elements of commonality in grief, each person and each situation is unique.
Grief has no predictable pattern or timetable. Though there are elements of commonality in grief, each person and each situation is unique. •Delay making major decisions if possible.
Delay making major decisions if possible. •The path of grief is one of twists and turns and you may often feel you are getting nowhere. Remember even setbacks are a kind of progress.
The path of grief is one of twists and turns and you may often feel you are getting nowhere. Remember even setbacks are a kind of progress. •This is the hardest thing you will ever do. Be patient with yourself.
This is the hardest thing you will ever do. Be patient with yourself. •Seek out people who are willing to listen when you need to talk and who understand your need to be silent.
Seek out people who are willing to listen when you need to talk and who understand your need to be silent. •Give yourself permission to seek professional help.
Give yourself permission to seek professional help. •Avoid people who try to tell you what to feel and how to feel it and, in particular, those who think you should “be over it by now.”
Avoid people who try to tell you what to feel and how to feel it and, in particular, those who think you should “be over it by now.” Find a support group for survivors that provides a safe place for you to express your feelings, or simply a place to go to be with other survivors who are experiencing some of the same things you're going through.
